Special thanks to Leontine from Leontine's Book Realm for the super header.


Thursday, June 3, 2010

Chia Pet Hell

Some of you may visit Reviews by JesseWave and have seen she's started an "advice to new authors" series. This week m/m romance author Ally Blue was first up and talked about being sure you know your characters. Somehow she got on a villain with a chia pet collection tangent and challenged someone to write about one. Then, Miss Smartypants Chris said one of the chia pets should be a shifter. Sigh. I never can resist a challenge. So, here you have .... Chia Pet Hell.

Just click on the Chia Pet below to get to the story.




In case someone can't visualize Donovan, I found him on Tumblr today. Just imagine lighter eyes. Perfect.

35 comments:

Chris said...

It was a fun (and VERY UNIQUE) story! Way to rise to the challenge, Tam!

So, where DID you find that picture??

Tam said...

Google baby. It was perfect. LOL

Did you click on the link? I'm wondering if other people can see the text on pages 4-12 and only I can't. Technology is not my friend some days.

Chris said...

It looks weird onscreen, but fine when I downloaded the pdf.

Katiebabs/ KB said...

I think I pissed my pants. Can't stop giggling.

Tam said...

I'll take that as a compliment KB. :-)

Oh well Chris, hopefully people will figure it out. I'll try it on Foxfire when I get home.

wren boudreau said...

What. A. Hoot. So clever Tam!

I didn't have any problem with the link, and I didn't have to download the pdf, so maybe it depends on the browser or it's mac-related?

Tam said...

Thanks Wren. It's probably our network here.

Amy Lane said...

OMG OMG OMG... *can't breathe* That was awesome! (Killing Michael Jackson was the kicker for me... sent the whole works spiraling into greatness!) a. maz. ing.

ErotRomReader (Janna) said...

Killing Michael Jackson, O_O
Crap, I can't remember my scribd login password! Have to read it online. Is the first sentence "Xavier woke up to a pounding headache" or is that one on page 3?

K. Z. Snow said...

:-D

Another jewel in your crown, Tam. OMFG. I swear, you are your own genre.

Kris said...

LOL! Awesome, Tam. :)

Jenre said...

Lol, Tam. I had to Google chai pet as I'd never heard of the things before. Must be a N American thing :).

Fab story and I especially liked that he couldn't off Princess Di :).

Juniper said...

Loved it, Tam - thankyou! (& I had to Google chai pet, too!)

jessewave said...

You are a crazy woman Tam. You would win the writing contest hands down. :)

Eyre said...

Tam, I am so jealous of your imagination! That was fabulous. It was the one spot of humor in my day from hell. Thanks for sharing it.

Val said...

Tam, this is awesome! I started seriously snickering at this part:

Oh crap. BDSM? That was so not his thing. What had he done? What if he was in some guy’s dungeon? Oh god oh god oh god. Maybe he was a slave; he’d have to do weird shit like kneel at some guy’s feet all day naked."

and it just kept on getting better! Thanks for rising to the challenge!

Tam said...

Finally I get back on-line.

Thanks so much for the kind words Amy. I'm flattered.

That is the first sentence Janna. If for some reason you can't access it I can always send you the Word file.

Tam said...

The burning question though KZ is how to describe that genre. Weird shit? :-) Thanks hon.

Thanks Jen. Of course Princess Di is un-breakable. Could it be any other way?

Well Juniper, it seems that I not only entertained the masses but educated them too. I can't believe they don't have chia pets worldwide. Someone should get on that. :-)

Tam said...

Thanks Wave. The only way I can win is if the inspiration picture is something like a one legged midget riding a unicorn wearing a corset and stalkings. The weirder the better seems to be my genre. :-)

Glad I could brighten your day a bit Eyre. Testing sucking? Ugh.

Tam said...

Thanks Val. It was fun and it just started flowing once I got going, although working in a shifter was not as easy as Chris made it seem it would be. *squinty eyed glare her way* ;-)

Chris said...

*angelic smile*

Lily said...

ROFL!!

Fabulous story. You'd definitely win Wave's contest. What an imagination you have. Are you sure you're not a world famous published author and this is just your fun online persona? I'm beginning to wonder about you. :D

Tam said...

Quite certain hon. Otherwise I'd be rolling in greenbacks. ;-) Or so I imagine. Thanks.

Michelle M. said...

Fantastic story Tam! More, more, more!

Tam said...

Thanks so much Michelle. :-)

Tracy said...

lolol Omg that was great! I didn't have any issue with the link - it worked fine for me. :)

I love how he lined Jackson up with Hitler - too funny!

Tam said...

Thanks Tracy. It seems to be working for me today. They said it's likely the firewall at work which made it look funny. Poor MJ. *shakes head*

ErotRomReader (Janna) said...

I finally read it, Tam! Hilarious! Never princess Diana, lol! Xavier is really something! :)

Tam said...

Thanks Janna. Glad it worked for you.

john said...

Very funny and well written. Screaming like an 8 year old at a Justin Beiber concert killed me.

Tam said...

Thanks John. I couldn't resist a Bieber reference. :-)

Stephani Hecht said...

LOL! I loved it.

Tam said...

Thanks Stephani.

Sweet Vernal Zephyr said...

Great story Tam! Does this stuff just magically form in your head, or do you have to work at it? LOL Thanks for the laugh :D

Tam said...

Thanks Miranda. Once I get an idea it just flows, I don't start with it all set in my brain, I just go until I reach the end.